Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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