I must be too annoying 4 u.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
