I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize