some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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