Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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