Swine flu. Run for my life!
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
