This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
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I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
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Jk probs not coming. Tequila
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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