I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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