I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
