I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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