Porn is love you can see.
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize