New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize