I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Randomize
