Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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