no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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