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• (623): View more from Arizona

  Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  I love how my cats smell like pot.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....

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• (920): View more from Wisconsin

  just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (647): View more from Ontario

  I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  he is risen halelujah

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.

  (1+61): View more from

  Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.

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• (631): View more from New York

  They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (720): View more from Colorado

  Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...

  (303): View more from Colorado

  God works in mysterious ways my friend.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.

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• (639): View more from

  you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days

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