I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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