I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
