How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
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