you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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