I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize