Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
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