I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize