rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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