At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
True college students do jello shots in the library
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