I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
