I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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