just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
