you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
