yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
lol hangovers are for mortals.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
