I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize