I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
