she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Did I show you my penis last night?
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All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
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I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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