that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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