He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Blood and glitter go together right?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Randomize
