I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
