i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize