Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize