just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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