So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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