If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
