i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
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