Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
