lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
