Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Randomize