I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
