I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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