She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Houston, we have a blender
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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