We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
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