is your mom at the bar?
Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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