this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
zippers are such a cool invention
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
